In my spiritual teaching, ECKANKAR, we believe that animals are soul too, like us humans (same with bugs, reptiles and all of life). We all learn our lessons and when ready we advance to a higher level of consciousness and ability. Since I work with inner spiritual masters, I knew my only way to work with Pumpkin now was to be of service inwardly, with the masters and to meet with him in my dreams. I just "knew" this, as this has become my "way" with this teaching. The dreams would come sporadically, but in some I could see that Pumpkin was in a realm where his emotional body was being soothed, loved, the fears being worked out, but he was still deeply in the process.
Being in this realm went on for many, many months. He was in such a state of distress and shock a lot of work needed to be done before he could get to a next level, or graduate to the next stage, "room."
During Pumpkin's first week missing I had a dream where I saw that he had accidentally gotten into a van and that van was moving all the way to the east coast and there was no way I could find the van, open the van, free him ... he was stuck. And in the same dream, I was in an airplane going west high in the sky, IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION. I though: "He is stuck in earth-bound karma, I am spiritually awake and free to make my choices. It was such a harsh piece of truth that my spiritual master gave me. Of course, I mourned that reality even more because I loved him so.
I had had a dream not too long after his death where Pumpkin was in my arms and we were battling a fierce storm in the ocean. I thought, "we will not make it." I pondered the meaning ... cats are afraid of water (usually death for a cat), we were together, we're on the ocean, in a boat, in a fierce storm. It had a foreboding sense of destruction about to happen. I wondered if we had once been together in a past life on a boat and drowned. I wondered if I was simply with him during his last moments in this life, when he went "down." And, of course, the water is the "spiritual waters of life" and the boat, is our spiritual bodies moving us on this water of life, together.
I remember a significant dream where I was at a dock with Pumpkin and his sister Tootsie (the one with Lyme) and we entered a medium sized row boat on some waters. We all got in together and that boat took us somewhere for Tootsie and Pumpkin to take their next step in this process of their spiritual evolution. It was an absolute knowing that I was allowed to be a part of the inner spiritual hierarchy to help move my babies across different inner destinations, for my own soothing as well as theirs, not to mention we were inseparable - and this was PROOF POSITIVE. I had another similar dream, months later, again, entering a boat and we were going to yet another destination.
I have had so many, many dreams since then with these two. The third cat, Yoda, was so "awake" (hence her name), she had come to me after she had "crossed over" from me putting "essential oils" on her to kill fleas ... yep, at the emergency animal hospital, the vet said cats and dogs die all the time from essential oils, their bodies can't metabolize them. That is another story, for another time, but when Yoda died at the hospital at 2 in the morning, in the waiting room, I heard this fluttering on the walls, like a bird trying to escape and can't ... it was Yoda, she had just left her body. Yoda came to me in a dream, two nights after her heart and lungs shut down in the hospital after 12 years together, sitting next to my bed, purring loudly, looking like her "young" self. When I recognized her and called: "Yoda!" she immediately soared into my arms and into my heart and we held each other for what seemed like eternity. The next morning, my guilt and heaviness was gone, Pumpkin and Tootsie had returned to their happy selves again. And, Yoda, MY guardian, was already onto her next job. I rarely had any dreams with her after that, except to say she was doing quite well (spiritually).
I had gotten a relapse of an illness a few years back, which is another story, and so was not in the position of acquiring any pets. So, I was "petless" since Pumpkin passed in 2008. In the summer of 2010, I moved back to the house I used to live in, in Salem, Oregon, with a delightful pond and waterfall, organic garden, fruit trees AND the ability to have "3 cats" again.
I began to start getting the dreams that Pumpkin was trying to find me. I have been through some hell trying to make the inner and outer "merge" ... I had one dream where I actually saw the inception of soul coming into the body of the kitten who was Pumpkin. That was a year ago. I could not find him a year ago. I went to a cat rescue place called "Salem Friends of Felines" and desperately looked into all the new kittens' eyes. Not there. I was told by another animal intuitive that a friend of a friend might mention a cat they had to give up. Nothing.
So, I have had to "trust" the process and trust that if in this next life, Pumpkin and I do not find each other, which is okay. I KNOW he is with a good family, because I KNOW I have helped set things up inwardly for him and I KNOW I have guided him to safe harbours where he will find a good home. I then had another dream recently that showed me picking up three orange kittens, one of them we bonded immediately, with that one licking me right away (even with its eyes closed). So, I am on the look out as we speak.
But in the meantime, last summer I got "Babey" who has so many resemblances of "Yoda" it is uncanny ... and who knows? Sometimes, I even accidentally call her "Yoda." Like, Yoda, this one is quite rare and highly intelligent and intuitive and we "soared to each other" at Friends of Felines. Then a month ago, I got "Elita" (means little strong one) ... a Shoe Siamese who 24/7 purrs, licks, smiles, plays and LOVES our "face licking" (chin licking) times. Both of the cats are a "match."
I met a cat foster mom at Salem Friends of Felines recently who has two mom cats with new batches of babies, some are orange. I will be visiting them soon. Mostly, I learned to let go of the urgency to connect with Pumpkin. I have every ‘knowingness’, we are always together, and for all I know, the two who are with me, may have been with me before, because the recognition and bonds seem like "old friends." I also got 4 hens that are wonderful soul additions, and who knows when and how Pumpkin and I will find each other, but one way or another, I KNOW we will because we are always connected inwardly.
Janette is recovering from her health condition as God continues to open up doors for her and she tenaciously finds answers. She works very full time and has an incredibly full life. She believes the more you serve life and open doors up for other souls, the more life will in turn open up doors and serve you as well. May the Blessings BE.
Click here to read Janette’s moving tribute to Tootsie.